Big 12 Champion – Oklahoma Sooners

After Bradford’s injury, Landry Jones stepped in and got tons of experience under his belt.  Look for him to torch big 12 defenses all year-long.  I expect Texas to have a rough year with the departure of Colt and some key members of their defense from a year ago.  We will be grinding out some 21+ point spreads on the Sooner’s in conference play this season.

Pac 10 Champion -  USC Trojans

Yes they have a new coach but with Masoli suspended and Gerhart gone I don’t see a real threat to The Trojans.  Plus Barkley now has a year under his belt with plenty of weapons around him.  Let’s just pray, the one bull shit conference game they do decide to blow, (Stanford, Washington) that we have our money tied up in The Sunbelt.

SEC Champion – Alabama Crimson Tide

I miss Tebow all ready.  Despite my hatred for Nick Satan he is one hell of a coach and should have Bama back in the SEC title game.  With Jesus Christ off the Gator’s sidelines and a head coach who apparently has more panic attacks than I do, I can’t see myself throwing cash Florida’s way like seasons past.

Big Ten – Ohio State Buckeyes

I don’t know who has a lower IQ Terrelle Pryor or Warren from There’s Something About Mary.   If Vince Young can get away with it why can’t Pryor?  I am going to lean hard on his athleticism all year-long.  I can’t wait to smash them against the league’s biggest homo – Tate Forcier and the Wolverines.  Remember I said that…

“Franks and Beans!”

Big East- Pittsburgh Panthers

As much as I will root for UCONN football this season, Dion Lewis is an OG.  Nothing like watching “The Stache” call 12 running plays in a row while you grind out a fourth quarter victory.  Easy money baby!

ACC- Virgina Tech Hokies

Va Tech will be reppin the best rushing attack in college football.  I like Miami’s talent this year but the defensive side of the ball is not where it needs to be to compete against the Hokie’s rushing attack.  If Ryan Williams can stay healthy he will have a shot at Heisman this year.  He is that good.

WAC- Boise State Broncos

Chris Peterson and his aliens should cruise to another easy conference championship.  If they pull off a win against Va Tech they will be seriously considered for a shot at the BCS Title.  If this scenario plays out I wonder if coach Peterson will let Tom Cruise give the pregame speech.

Conference USA- Houston Cougars

You think they can score 100 points in a game this year?  I say they get close.  Case Keenum will throw for over 600 yards in a losing effort only once this year as Houston completes their run at a conference championship.  Those unders are tempting when set at 84 points, but buyer beware - this offense is out of this world (particularly against Conference USA defenses).

Mountain West- TCU Horned Frogs

It will only be 3 weeks into the season before me and Mason go to blows during a drunken argument about how underrated TCU is.  They are definitely a fan favorite these days but I think large spreads in conference play will end up biting us in the ass this year.  Watch out for RLM while the public smash The Horned Frogs.

Sun Belt- Troy State Trojans

OHHHHHH YEAAAAAA…The money makers.  While it may be exciting to bet on the televised marquee matchups week in and week out, the real money lies in the Sun Belt.  I call it gambling’s best kept secret.  Let the bookmakers browse over those games while I smash them like Gallagher does a watermelon.  If you see me randomly screaming “Yahtzee” after staring down at  my phone at 10 pm in a bar it’s not because I’m getting laid that night.  It’s because Troy just scored to go up 50.  Thank you very little!

See you all soon with Week 1 lines and picks.  Until then I’ll try to control my tremors…

Boise State is coming off an impressive unbeaten season capped off by a 17-10 victory over third ranked TCU in the Fiesta Bowl.  Boise enters the 2010 season returning 21 of 22 starters including quarterback Kellen Moore who threw for over 3,500 yards a year ago.  While bringing back an entire team that won a BCS Bowl game a year ago is impressive, it is not the strongest argument as to why Boise has a shot at beating Va Tech on the road.

In my opinion Boise’s biggest advantage will be standing on the sidelines come game day.  Chris Petersen is a twisted individual.  He is also the head coach and play caller for The Broncos.  Giving a Scientologist 8 months to game plan may be one of the more horrifying concepts in all of sports.  It was last reported that Chris Peterson rose from his bed in the wee hours of the morning following their bowl victory and marched deep into the woods carrying nothing but a pen and pad of yellow lined paper.  He returned home 4 months later with a game plan.  This may be the first time a team actually runs the Annexation of Puerto Rico in a live game.

Virginia Tech may be the faster and more athletic team in this match up but with a flea flicker here and a statue of liberty there you will be surprised how quickly a defense will be back on their heels.  The play calling we could see in this game will be bizarre enough to make Gus Malzahn say, “What the %#$@.”  Chris Peterson’s playbook is more disturbing than Charles Manson’s diary and we will have a chance to see it all on display come Labor Day.  If Boise is getting a field goal or more it will be hard to stay away from Chris Peterson and the Broncos.   It may be 4 months away from kick off but my god am I ready….

“Ace Right- 3J- X Jagger -Zebra dig- on 2 on 2″

Stay tuned for week one lines and our picks.

It’s been a long time coming for us to get back involved with this whole thing. We raked during football season. And saying we raked really isn’t a strong enough adjective to describe what actually occurred this fall. Let’s just say it was a sad day when the final whistle sounded and we had to settle up.

And ever since Super Bowl Sunday we’ve been having some withdrawal issues. The trips to the casinos for some craps are great, but we really, really missed this. So the Kentucky Derby came at the perfect time, because I could tell by the looks on some of the guys faces that there was a hefty bet about to be placed on the Nationals-Marlins game any second.

Churchill Downs was an absolute mess on Saturday, so that left plenty of room for the this scene to be played out over and over by the guys as we began to handicap the race. Not that we really know anything about handicapping a horse race, but we definitely knew we needed a mudda.

Myself, I got anxious and put win-action on Super Saver, Lookin’ at Lucky and Sidney’s Candy (what a disaster that was). Then I boxed those same three on a Trifecta. Rich meanwhile apparently had made the Super Saver call earlier that day at the beach, and he became a bit, uh, violent, when he tried to reiterate the fact that this horse was a stone cold lock. Regardless, I think we were confident for a few reasons:

• Super-jockey Calvin Borel was riding, and we all love his hold-em-back style which is perfect for The Derby.
• We’d spent all day listening to the talking heads feel bad for Todd Pletcher. It was a way too much, but it was setting up for a storybook ending.
• We’re never wrong when we initially make a pick. I guess there is something to be said for confidence. Or at least blind faith.

So finally, post-time arrived. We got Super Saver at 15-1 odds at our book, while he was about 7-1 at the track. Decent value. Gavin laid down his first action ever, and went in strong to say the least. He woke up with a stiff one today I’d imagine. Needless to say, this exact scene played out:

Except for the fact that there was 15 of us,  Eddie screamed out “Where’s our horse?!” at least 5 times, and Rich punched my dog in the face while he did his best Willie Randolph waving in the horse from 3rd base.

Calvin Borel, you made a play!

And, we’re back to old habits…

(We’re on the Lakers -7 today. I think I’m going to be sick.)